Mondaze

Off my game today.

Rolled out of bed later than I wanted to. Yesterday was a lot of physical activity, to be fair. Best friend came over at 8am and we got a 5-mile walk in before 10 am. Not too long after that I went outside and got up on the roof. Living surrounded by pine trees can be nice, but it’s also a pain when it comes to cleaning gutters. We’ve got several days of rain ahead of us so I needed to get the gutters cleared out so we don’t have waterfalls coming over the sides of them.

Then it was the yard.

Got the mower going and knocked out the front and backyard, along with cleaning off the front and back porch from all the debris that dropped from cleaning the roof. I think I was done with it all by noon. Oh, and a couple dog walks during the day. All in all I got in over 17,000 steps and almost 9 miles yesterday. I didn’t feel bad by the end of the day, just tired. Grilled some hot dogs and asparagus, along with some homemade potato salad and baked beans for dinner. I ate like a starving man and crashed by 8pm on the couch.

So yeah, I’m feeling pretty off my game today.

Just didn’t have the pep in my step on this Monday like I normally do. Got out of the shower late, made my oatmeal late, packed my lunch late, and almost forgot my gym bag. I did forget my blood pressure cuff, which surprised me. We’ve got one of those blood pressure kiosks out in the break room like they have the grocery store over by the pharmacy, so I guess I’ll have to use that like the common folk do. I’ll just have to find a time when there’s not people out there at break. I don’t want people staring at me while I’m checking my blood pressure. That’s uncomfortable.

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I haven’t had one of these days in a long time, this kind of grey cloud day in my head. It’s nothing like it used to be, but I’ll be honest I don’t miss them at all on any level of severity or non-severity. I’ve gotten used to being this even keel sort of guy post-heart failure diagnosis. Taking the days in stride and not letting the world or people or events or inanimate objects bother me. I can’t really say that I feel bothered today, but like I woke up in a slightly off, but still my universe. Maybe it’s the shitty weather that’s headed our way, or maybe I wore myself out with too much work yesterday. Or maybe it’s because the scale said I gained 3.3lbs from yesterday morning. Or that I drank some beer this weekend and feel bad about it. Maybe it’s all of that.

Or maybe I just need to realize that life moves on and the grateful contentedness of being alive and feeling good after such a long, scary few months sometimes isn’t enough to fight off the Mondaze. Sometimes, you wake up slightly off and you have to work through it until the kinks and knots and lumps smooth themselves out.

Sometimes, well a Monday is just a Monday and that’s all there is to it.