“Return of Speed Toilet”

I’m not really sure what the hell I did, but I’m sore today. Like I rolled down a hill or something…for 10 minutes straight. My left shoulder has been sore for a week now. It’s not a “pain” per say. It’s more like this dull ache, as if some muscle or tendon became shorter somehow. […]

Sunday…the day before Monday

Today has been a day of rest, for sure. I’ve spent a good portion of the day in my chair reading and listening to records. I started Chuck Palahniuk’s Damned. I’m not sure whether I love it or I want to line a litter box with it. Jury is still out on that one. Album-wise […]

Tilbury :: Northern Comfort

In 2012 I came across a rather bizarre album cover and I listened to said album on looks alone. I know, you shouldn’t judge a book(or album) by its cover, but in this situation it was the best possible choice I could’ve made. Tilbury was the band, and Exorcise was the album and it blew […]

Atlas, I Am Not

While I do occasionally support my own little sphere in this great big crazy world, I don’t sport the glutes, pecs, abs, and biceps that our primordial Greek friend did. I am a mere mortal man, attempting to extend his measly life a few more years by working out (semi)regularly. To be alive a smidgen […]

Death Makes Caricatures Of Us All

It’s a weird statement, but in my head a true one. It’s not something anyone said per say, but something generally close to what was mentioned in passing. It’s also both metaphorically and literally the case. We live our lives and create a perception of who we are. If we’re honest in our day-to-day lives […]

An Extremely Long Short Week

For a week I’ve only been at work two days it seems like an eternity. Just another one of those extremely long short weeks. From Saturday to Tuesday we were landlocked inside the walls of stately Hubner Manor with too few beers, not enough flour, not much milk, but plenty of love and a stockpile […]

The Polar Vortex…not like other vortexes

We are in our second day of the great Midwest Polar Vortex. I’ve honestly never heard of a polar vortex before, but it’s kind of a cool name. And really, something that’s allowing me to stay home from work for the second day in a row can’t be all that bad. My boss called last […]

Nineteen Years

The last twenty four hours I’ve thought a lot about friendships. You go through life and create many friendships. Some are tried and true, while others are great while they last but eventually fade. I have a very small handful of friends that I’ve known and loved since childhood. I would do anything for these […]

Resolutions? We don’t need no stinking resolutions!

Yeah, I know. It’s THAT time of the year where everyone looks back on the past year’s failures and wishes them away with a New Year’s resolution. “I’m too fat. I’m gonna lose 30 lbs.” “I drink too much. I’m gonna quit drinking!” “I’m gonna stop smoking in 2014. That’s my resolution!” Yeah, well let […]

Ole. Okay?

Technically my week-long sabbatical from work is over. It’s Friday evening, 6:38pm to be exact, and this would now be considered just another Friday night. But fear not, I’m not letting technicalities bring me down. No way, pal. The big cold shoulder from Mother Nature is on it’s way, and she’s making it extra cold. […]