2023 : We Hardly Knew Ye

Hello Folks.

We’re officially one week out from Christmas. What does that mean? Well, it means that we’re only two weeks out from New Year’s Day. That means that 2023 is an old geezer of a year and that 2024’s water is about to break. My sense of time and the passage of time has been severely corrupted by 2020. Time just doesn’t pass like it used to. While the overall macro of time seems to keep speeding up, the micro can still feel like it drags ass(i.e., work days.) That creates an almost guilt in me for wishing days would hurry the hell up, as when I get to two weeks before the New Year I feel like I wasted yet another year and didn’t accomplish enough.

I’m 50 now. I can’t afford to waste a damn year.

The last three months of 2023 were marred by a constant haze of anxiety, thanks to one of our kids’ lives going a bit topsy-turvy. Things have improved, but the learning curve is till pretty great. She’s still figuring out things like time management and making better choices when it comes to being a responsible adult living on her own. Those decisions roll over into my wife and I’s lives as well, since if she loses her job or mucks up her night classes then certain financial obligations fall into our lap. We’re hoping she’s getting on the right path regarding getting up on time and making better decisions with her time. It’s a steep learning curve, for sure.

My son’s girlfriend has been living with us since May. I don’t have much to complain about, as she’s quiet and cleans up after herself. She’s a “good kid”, as my parents would say. This is her last week of high school, as she graduates in January. No plans of going to college yet, so she’s going to look for a full-time job after she returns from Texas for a week over Christmas with her parents. Yeah, she’s going to Texas for an entire week with her mom and dad to visit her brother and niece. Not sure how that will play out, as she prefers to have our son with her these days when with them. Apparently they like to make little jabs and remarks about her appearance(septum piercing and colored hair), but then don’t say anything when our son is with them. I’m just hoping for the best and that she can get through the week without having a nervous breakdown.

Our oldest has made big strides this year. They’ve bought a new(ish) car, are still working at the North Webster Public Library as well as the Tippecanoe Boat Company, and has plans to move down to Indianapolis in the spring with a friend and get a place. They’ll start looking for library jobs in January/February. Our oldest also came out as non-binary to us back in October. We’ve known they were gay, well, for awhile. But they came out a couple years ago. Well, now they’re non-binary. What does that mean? Well, it means they go by the name Rain now(which is just their middle name shortened) and prefer they/them pronouns. Other than that, they’re still our oldest and they’re still an amazingly smart and loving human being. We talk movies and shows all the time, and we went to the Kurt Vonnegut museum together a couple weeks ago. They’re the same, wonderful human that their mom and I raised and have continually been proud of ever since they started reading when they were three-years old. While it’s been an adjustment(mainly remembering to call them Rain), I have enough respect for my child to do as they wish. If it feels right to them, who the hell am I to question that? And that goes for anyone else in the same situation.

I’ve read 26 books this year. Well, I’ve listened to nearly 26 audiobooks, while reading a handful the old fashioned way. Think what you will about audiobooks, but there’s a hell of a lot of time in the day where you can’t hold a book in your hands and read it. But with audiobooks you can get through one while cleaning the house, running around town in the car, mowing the lawn, on your daily walks, and long car rides. And as long as the narrator isn’t awful I can lock in pretty well with an audiobook. Feels good getting through that many books.

Music, as usual, has been a major part of the year for me. At the end of 2022 I was feeling pretty lackluster about buying records. Maybe it was just burnout, but when I bought that Onkyo disc changer things opened up. Started buying CD box sets and kind of fell in love with music buying once again. Of course I still bought vinyl this year, but CDs felt significant once again. Nothing like loading up 5 discs and hitting play. Hours of play time and no worries of flipping anything to side B. Me and Miles have gotten reacquainted this year, and I’ve dug it.

I bought a new multi-track recorded back in October. So far, I’ve recorded 4 instrumental tracks with a keyboard and a wonky little multi-effects pedal I bought on the cheap. It’s nice having a recorder that isn’t 20 years old. I definitely see 2024 as being a year where I get some more music out into the world.

I slowed down on the art towards the latter part of 2023. Too much other stuff going on. But I hope to change that trend and continue to make things, because I do love making things. My Instagram art account getting hacked and then ultimately losing 10 years of pictures – as well as my Facebook acct – was a bitter pill to swallow. So making art was put on the back burner. The one good thing about that was I stopped caring about social media. Dumped my Twitter(X) account and have a new FB acct as only a means to talk to people via Messenger. Other than that, I’m good without them.

2023 is nearly a blur in the rear view mirror. There was some decent moments(seeing QOTSA with my son, date nights with my wife, our youngest graduating, lots of great music and movies, wife and daughter seeing Broadway shows in NYC) and some not-so decent moments, but I guess that’s what life is. A series of moments, good and bad based on the person. I can’t complain. I’m still relatively healthy and can exercise to better that situation when I don’t talk myself out of it. I’ve got a great family, and currently am still gainfully employed. I’ve got friends I can rely on(and who can rely on me), and all my kids are healthy and figuring things out. My parents are still alive and healthy. So despite some disappointments this year, we’re all still here and doing the thing.

2023, smell ya later.