There Are Teens In My Living Room….Help!

Hello folks. It’s Friday night. There are four 14 year old girls giggling uncontrollably in the living room and I’m delegated to my bedroom to type this. Why can’t I go out there and take my seat back? Am I afraid of their laughing and somewhat distressing way of communication(quiet, loud, quiet…they’re like the Pixies.) […]

Another Nightmare About A Dirty Toilet

I’m not sure what happened to me as a child that had something to do with a filthy public restroom, but whatever that repressed memory is it must be a doozy. As far back as I can recall I’ve had nightmares about dirty public restrooms. I don’t know, maybe they’re more anxiety dreams than nightmares. […]

A Dog’s Life

On Easter we congregated at my mom and dad’s house. It was an informal gathering of my parents, my brother, sister-in-law, niece, aunt, and of course my wife and kids. Oh, and my parent’s dog Gunther. Gunther is a miniature schnauzer, though “miniature” doesn’t correctly describe Gunther. Gunther is the largest miniature dog I’ve ever […]

How I Spent Record Store Day 2014

I woke at 6:30am. It was a bright, sunny Saturday morning. Coffee brewing at extra strong. Karma Records was opening at 8am, so I needed to be at full throttle by then. I didn’t know what to expect. My plan was to get there at 7:30am and wait out in the cold, biting air like […]

Weird Scenes Inside The Hall of Superheroes or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying and Love Spring Break

Is everybody in? Is everybody in? Is everybody in? The ceremony is about to begin Grown men in tights. That kind of thing would normally make me uncomfortable. Possibly squirm in my seat, even. I’m not much for the ballet and overzealous cod pieces. Remember that guy on Captain Kangaroo? The skin suit guy that […]

Spring Break

We’ve arrived at that time of the year where many Midwesterners flock to Florida and pretend they’re not Midwesterners. College kids drinking dangerously close to mental annihilation and exhibiting behavior that would’ve made Nero blush. But here in Jhubner73 headquarters we don’t do that kind of nonsense. What’s spring break mean for us? Not a […]

Nightmares and other great memories

I once had this dream that I was inside Dracula’s castle. It wasn’t Bela Lugosi’s, Frank Langella’s, Chris Sarandon’s, Gary Oldman’s, or even Leslie Nielson’s Dracula. It was the castle in the old NES game ‘Castlevania’. It was quite gorgeous from what I can remember. Huge, curtained windows, sprawling rooms, cathedral-like ceilings, an old grand […]

Screaming Goats and My Parents

You know, I’m just like everyone else in the world. I’m just like you, really. I go through life trying to be the best person I can be. I have my ups and downs. I look in the mirror some mornings and I like who I see staring back. Other mornings not so much. I […]

It’s A Long Way To The Top(if you wanna rock n’ roll on a Saturday afternoon.)

There are many defining moments in ones life. Graduation, marriage, becoming a parent, and that first gig that goes to hell. Sure, not everyone hits that moment in their life. There are quite a few folks that will never know that utter disappointment, embarrassment, and complete crushing defeat of a music gig that falls flat […]

Atlas, I Am Not

While I do occasionally support my own little sphere in this great big crazy world, I don’t sport the glutes, pecs, abs, and biceps that our primordial Greek friend did. I am a mere mortal man, attempting to extend his measly life a few more years by working out (semi)regularly. To be alive a smidgen […]